Wednesday, December 10, 2008

It Is A Good Thing I Worked Three Jobs And Didn't Go On Welfare....

....because our government needed to save my money so they could give it to the auto industry. And after the auto industry they need my money to give to the banking industry, the insurance industry, and the mortgage industry.

And after the execs from those industries all fill their greedy palms with coins, for good measure maybe we can just continue the trend and and dip into that infinite stash o' cash and bail out the airline industry. And then maybe next we can reform the zoos of America because I heard the monkeys are really pissed off about their current living conditions. They actually want memory foam beds and food from local sources and we can just put our tax money to work for them too.

And then, maybe when that is all said and done we can pay off a few more mortgages, you know, those folks who have fallen behind since we started paying off the OTHER mortgages that have fallen behind and then finally, we can all just return to working for a living. Because the handouts, they cannot last forever...and shit, someone has to work!

This is only right it seems, as I have worked two and sometimes three jobs to avoid putting myself on welfare, government assistance and therefore qualification for any of such programs and I have twice, sold property to avoid being swept up by some morgtage crisis throughout the past fifteen years. I must be blessed with something these folks are not. Irish luck perhaps? Stellar financial prowness? I should just keep working for the man, right? Not roll over and give up? Refrain from feeling entitled to handouts because I am, cough, cough...better than that?

Given the circumstances I am having a difficult time NOT chalking myself up to some kind of financially savvy rocket scientist if these people truly need my money moreso than me. In fact, I fall into what is quite likely the most unlikely of statistical categories to NOT be an active part in creating this mess in the first place: single mother, employed, foreign car driving, graduate student, home owner, etc. And I am not in line nor do I stand to directly benefit from ANY handout, far as I can tell. Not bad considering I cannot balance my checkbook, if I do say so myself!

So go ahead, take my money, and give it to these folks...they surely DESERVE it and are ENTITLED to it more than me. And I'll just keep on working for the man. Whoever that fat assed, lazy, hand out seeking bastard is.

Yes, I am bitter.

No, I do not want to give my hard earned money to a bunch of people who make shitty cars.

No I do not intend to buy one of your shitty American cars because those cars break and they are gas guzzlers and they generally just suck, and had the American auto industry realized this and actually intended to compete globally like the free market we claim to have invented versus rubbing their collective bellies in wonderment as they built yet another gas guzzler, we would not be sitting smack in the middle of this shitty mess to begin with.

But I digress.

I have received these separate images from multiple people this a.m. and I think that we can all agree on one is a helluva lot more fun to laugh at this than it is to wrap our collective minds around how far we have truly fallen. So I leave you with this:

And this:
It is a good thing Jesus is having his Birthday Party here again soon, and that the Detroit breathren have their number already staked out as FIRST in line to the "party" line, of course, before the Germans, the Japanese, and all the other auto makers.

I hate to break it to you, but Jesus loves you and Jesus loves me, but he loves the American auto industry the MOST.

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